Karaoke Confessions of Urashima Keitaro
by Comp Ninja
Summary: Stuck without the money to pay for a bill, Keitaro turns a potentially humiliating encounter with karaoke into a chance to confess his true feelings for Naru.


Disclaimer: I do not own "Love Hina" or "Get Ready" by the Temptations.  
Warning: Set in an alternate timeline where it conflicts with release dates of newer songs.  
  
  
  
Karaoke Confessions of Urashima Keitaro  
"Get Ready" by the Temptations  
  
  
  
"Please, Kitsune, for the love of God, don't make me go up there." Kitsune stared disapprovingly at the puddle of sweat gathering around his feet. "Can't we just do dishes like normal people?"  
  
"No. And you know why? Because the people offering to pay for the meals *want* us to do this." Kitsune looked out in a crowd. "Besides, I softened them up for you."  
  
Keitaro folded his arms together and nodded his chin to air. "Nope, you can't make me Kitsune. I won't do it." Keitaro hated acting like the selfish brat all the time when things went sour, but this time he could not humiliate himself like that. The humiliation of flying on Naru punches across Tokyo or having kendo warrior threaten to castrate him he could handle just fine, but he drew the line at death by public humiliation. "Besides, I couldn't carry a note if my life depended on it. I won't rather scrub dishes than go out there and make a fool out of myself. Can't we talk them into something else?"  
  
"Hey, Keitaro, cool it, will you?" Kitsune put her hands in Keitaro's pockets and he started to nosebleed. Before anything he expected to happen happened, Kitsune pulled her hands, turning his pockets inside out as she did. "*We* did not forget to bring the money. *We* did not announce that fact in front of a waiter before *we* had the chance to slip away. So, therefore, *we* should not have had to do anything, but they didn't even want to hear you sing. But when Mutsumi passed out on stage, they demanded that someone replace her before they decide to withdraw their gracious offer."  
  
Keitaro struggled to locate a weak spot in Kitsune's airtight logic. Urashima Keitaro wished he had remembered to bring his money, because he'd have paid a fortune not to go up there and ruin a classic in front of all those nice people who wanted nothing more than spend an uneventful night eating good food and listen to people try to their hand at their favorite songs. "Can't one of the other girls take her place?"  
  
Kitsune grimaced at what must have looked like further evidence of Keitaro's growing inability to remember what happened less than a few minutes ago. Keitaro could clearly remembered his problem with asking that question, but Kitsune would have fun tearing him to pieces for his mental slip-up anyway.   
  
"Idiot, don't you remember? All the other girls, Haruka and Seta-san have already sang. We don't have anyone to replace you with." Keitaro could clearly remember the sequence now. The benefactors refused to let them choose Japanese songs, so they challenged the girls and Seta to sing English songs, perferably classics. Noriyasu Seta had sang a "Remember The Time" by Michael Jackson. Haruka, Kaolla and Sarah had sang as a trio "Independent Women" by Destiny's Child. Maehara Shinobu sang "All You Wanted" by Michelle Branch, dedicated to her "sempai," Urashima Keitaro. Motoko sang "Die Another Day" by Madonna, she sang quite well in morbid way, she certainly enjoyed how the many English words for "death" rolled off her tongue.   
  
"Yeah, but, if you put me up there, I'll just ruin everyone's dining experience," Keitaro told Kitsune. Perhaps, the people paying for their meals wanted to see Keitaro humiliate himself, but would they allow him to further aggravate their customers after Narusegawa slapped the manager and threatened to punch him out in front of everyone for referring to Keitaro as her boyfriend.  
  
"Come on Keitaro, Naru needs you to do this ... for her." Kitsune had hit a nerve. If anything happened to Narusegawa out of his cowardice, he would never forgive himself. Kitsune knew she had tapped Urashima Keitaro's achilles heel, his love for Narusegawa.   
  
Apparently, if the manager wanted to split hairs, he could easily call the police and have Narusegawa arrested for aggravated assault. Keitaro could not let her end up in jail because he did not have the guts to go up there and sing a stupid song. But Keitaro did not want to follow Kitsune's act. She had done a pretty fair impersonation of Pink while singing the song, "Get The Party Started." Those people would surely expect him to out do her somehow. "Come on, Kitsune, you can't let me go after you. You looked like you could have sang that song in your sleep. What if they laugh at me?"  
  
Kitsune nodded, patting Keitaro on the head. "Keitaro, Keitaro, Keitaro, don't worry about it. They laughed at Narusegawa, remember?" Keitaro did remember. Since the manager wanted to put the girl who slapped him and threatened to punch him through some public humiliation, the sadistic manager made her sing "Like a Virgin" onstage. Narusegawa turned so red he worried about her volcano redhead erupting and covering the audience in molten hot lava. If Narusegawa could survive that sort of humiliation, then Keitaro could easily withstand whatever the audience had planned for him.   
  
"Besides, if you get nervous, just imagine the whole audience naked." Keitaro looked up and saw the other girls in the back with the audience. Imagining Narusegawa naked would not calm his nerves. Seeing Narusegawa or any of the other girls naked always heralded beatings that made him too scared to speak, let alone sing. Kitsune scratched her and looked out into the audience, as if seeing what he saw. "Okay, bad advice. Every master has her secret and so do I. When I sing I think about two things. I think about something I have a lot of passion for and sing about it. Then, I think about someone I have a lot of passion for and imagine that someone staying behind me."   
  
Keitaro smiled, he knew two things that fit that describe and they both answered to the same name: Narusegawa. "Well, you have a passion for parties, I can believe that, but tell something, Kitsune." Keitaro leaned into Kitsune, turning the tables on Kitsune and making her the nervous one sweating a puddle at the base of her feet. "Who do *you* imagine staying behind you up there? Anyone I know?" Keitaro looked out into the audience, seeing the girls cradling an unconscious Mutsumi, Haruka and Seta searching into each other's eyes.  
  
Kitsune turned the bright red color of a person blushing so much she no longer had blood in any part of her except her face. Moments before draining all of the blood into her cheeks, she sputtered a reply. "None of your business!" Kitsune pointed anxiously to the stage. "Now go out there and choose your means of execution before I do." Keitaro smiled and sauntered onto the stage. That exchange with Kitsune made him feel like a million bucks. Somehow, he had tapped Kitsune's Achilles heel and that had allowed him, if just for a moment, to get the better of the fox lady for once, instead of the other way around.  
  
Keitaro continued his confident stride through the curtains and looked around to see everyone still moved by Kitsune's performance a moment ago. Keitaro took the microphone off its stand and prepared to speak into. Given to what extraordinary acts of clumsiness, Keitaro prided himself for not causing the microphone to roll offstage. As the microphone slipped out of the sweat on his palms, Keitaro scrambled to the floor and grabbed it before it fell off stage. That little unplanned bit of slapstick humor drew laugh or two from the crowd. Before he doomed himself to night of people laughing at him, he tried to relieve his tension by getting them to laugh with him for a little while.   
  
"Hey folks," Keitaro spoke, stopping as the microphone screeched at first. Again, everyone laughed at him. "As I said, hey folks, my friends and confidants know me as Urashima Keitaro. Some of you may know me as that blur you see flying over the skies of Tokyo every night." That drew a lot of laughter from the crowd. Apparently, his flights through the sky on Naru punches had not gone unnoticed by the general public. "Word of advice to all the guys out there: If you want to take a bunch of girls out for a night on the town, remember to bring your wallet or might end up here trying to sing your way out of the bill." Some of the audience laughed. A few of the guys laughed too, but did so nervously as their female companions eyed them with newfound suspicion.   
  
"Okay, well then, a girl backstage gave me some helpful hints about singing." Keitaro cleared his forehead of unwanted sweat. "She said that the secret of good karaoke comes from finding your passion and singing from it." Keitaro pressed the microphone. "Well, folks, I have such a passion in my life. She makes everyday worth living to me. Her smile could make my worst day my best without even trying. She makes my life worth waking up in the morning for." As the audience gave him an admiring "aaaawww" for his improvisated love poetry, Keitaro looked as the suspicious female companions started to warm up their male companions again. That brought a smile to his face, to see his words reuniting couples.   
  
"So I dedicate this song to ..." Keitaro looked out at the audience as they waited in anticipation of a name. "Do I dare say her name in public?" As the audience urged him to tell the name, Keitaro decided to play off the mood. "Sorry, I can't hear you, say it louder, I can't hear you." As the audience started to chant for him to reveal the name, Keitaro finally waved in his hand like a white flag surrendering to enemy fire.   
  
"Okay, okay. You got me. I'll tell you. I would like to dedicate this rendition of 'Get Ready' by the Temptations to the one girl who gets my heart pumping ... among other things." Wolf whistles from the guys and some of the girls and the blushing of his tenants from the Hinata-sou told him not to leave everyone in suspense. Keitaro extended a finger into the audience as a spotlight fell on the seat he had directed it to. "I dedicate this song to you, Narusegawa Naru, my one and only passion. Give her a hand, folks." An applause rose from the crowd as Narusegawa Naru tried to hide herself from the roaming spotlight. "Listen carefully, Narusegawa, because I may never have the courage to do this again." Keitaro clicked his fingers and the spotlight turned to him. "And get ready, because here I come." The curtains parted and revealed the karaoke video set blaring background music.   
  
"[I never met a girl who makes me feel the way that you do. (You're alright)"   
Whenever I'm asked who makes my dreams real, I say that you do. (You're outta sight)]"   
  
Narusegawa started to smile as Keitaro hit every note with impossible accuracy.   
  
"[So, fee-fi-fo-fum   
Look out baby, 'cause here I come.]"  
  
Narusegawa loved the attention. Her mother never quite showed her this kind of affection and she doubted her ability to handle romance as well as most people. Keitaro couldn't blame her. Before he left Kitsune sputtering for air, he doubted his own romantic prowess as well. But doing the impossible of taking Kitsune down a notch made him feel invincible.   
  
"[And I'm bringing you a love that's true.   
So get ready, so get ready.   
I'm gonna try to make you love me too.   
So get ready, so get ready 'cause here I come.]"  
  
Keitaro loved this experience. He had several dozen people staring at him and for once not one of them thought of him as an idiot or anything like that. He had this crowd in the palm of his hands. Before too long, they would need surgeons to remove him away from this microphone.   
  
"[(Get ready 'cause here I come) I'm on my way.   
(Get ready 'cause here I come)]"  
  
Narusegawa started to get up and make an escape for the exit. Before she could leave this place, Keitaro did the impossible by front flipping off the stage and cornering Narusegawa against a potted plant.   
  
"[If you wanna play hide and seek with love, let me remind you (It's alright)   
But the lovin' you're gonna miss and the time it take to find you (It's outta sight)]"   
  
Narusegawa did not want to look Keitaro in the face. But as soon as the spotlight hit them, Narusegawa needed someone to look at to keep from seeing the other audience members and the another tenants staring at her. She found safe harbor in Keitaro's eyes.  
  
"[So, fiddley-dee, fiddley-dum   
Look out baby, 'cause here I come.]"  
  
Keitaro pushed the microphone against his lips.   
  
"[And I'm bringing you a love that's true.   
So get ready, so get ready.   
I'm gonna try to make you love me too.   
So get ready, so get ready 'cause here I come.]"   
  
As the spotlight shifted away from her to Keitaro as he returned to the stage, he could swear he saw a fully-fleshed smile on her face.  
  
"[(Get ready 'cause here I come) I'm on my way.   
(Get ready 'cause here I come)   
(Ger ready)]"   
  
[Instrumental] As he took a breather, he looked across to see Kitsune, ego shattered, with a piano wire in her hands. Kitsune had taken his prying into her private life quite personally and seemed prepared to find any means necessary to put the immortal Urashima Keitaro out of her misery.   
  
"[If all my friends should want you too, I'll understand it. (Be alright)   
I hope I get to you before they do, the way I planned it. (Be outta sight)]"   
  
Keitaro dodged Kitsune as she tried to wrap the wire around his neck. Even if she could not kill him, trying to strangle him with piano wire would keep him for breathing and ultimately keep him from finishing his song.   
  
"[So tiddley-dee, tiddley-dum   
Look out baby, 'cause here I come.]"  
  
Thinking fast as Kitsune narrowed the gap between him and twelve inches of piano wire, Keitaro found his reply. Grabbing the microphone stand, Keitaro swept Kitsune off her legs and sent her tumbling off the stage.   
  
"[And I'm bringing you a love that's true.   
So get ready, so get ready.   
I'm gonna try to make you love me too.   
So get ready, so get ready 'cause here I come.]"   
  
Keitaro's smile returned as he realized Narusegawa had not taken her best friend's attempted murder as an opportunity to sneak out of the restaurant.   
  
"[(Get ready 'cause here I come) I'm on my way.   
(Get ready 'cause here I come)   
(Get ready 'cause here I come-a)   
(Get ready)]"  
  
Keitaro received standing ovation and Narusegawa used her best friend's unconscious body as a trampoline to leap onto the stage. Surrounded by all his friends and a lot of people he did not know, Narusegawa flung his glasses off the stage and sank her lips into his. As she eased Keitaro backstage and onto the floor, the man operating the curtain did the decent thing and closed the curtain behind the two lovebirds. The audience cleared out of the restaurant trying to ignore the mushy sounds going on behind the curtain. The other girls probably wanted to stop this from happening, but Keitaro could hear the manager threatening to withdraw his offer if they did anything to disturb the couple. Keitaro's performance had brought the old man to tears. Keitaro could not really tell. Right now, Naru and himself had found safe harbor in each other's eyes.  
  
  
  
  
  
THE END 


End file.
